Upperclassmen Uncensored: The Advice Column

Welcome to the new and improved Blake Beat advice column, where your esteemed upperclassmen, Sofia, Alayna, Lauren, who, along with the sporadic appearance of guest writers, answer any and all burning questions that our Bengals have every other Friday! Feel free to send us questions at any time, at this link! Hope you enjoy!

What can a guy do to catch the attention of a girl in most cases? Also how to approach, dm or in person, what do girls like most?

Alayna: My biggest piece of advice for getting a girl’s attention is to just be yourself! The most attractive quality a person can have is authenticity. People can tell when you’re trying to be someone you’re not, so I’d definitely try to avoid acting out of character to impress someone. Besides, you want to be with someone who likes you for you! Everyone is different, but I think most people prefer to be approached in person. Even if you have good intentions, approaching a girl you don’t know can come off as a little creepy sometimes, so make sure you aren’t pressuring them or being too pushy when you approach. Introduce yourself and try to find some common interests to chat about. Good luck!!!!!!!

Sofia: So true, Alayna! And worst case scenario, she says no, don’t take it too hard on yourself!!!! It’s high school, the beginning of your life. You’re going to meet so many other people in your life. One negative romantic experience won’t be the end of the world. It’s okay to be sad, but don’t spend your whole high school career mourning. You’ll be okay!!!!

Is there any advice you can give for people who need help with putting themselves out there?

Alayna: As someone who’s grown up pretty shy, I can definitely relate to the struggle of trying to put yourself out there. I think the best way to try new things and make friends is to join clubs or activities. Joining a club will allow you to branch out and meet with people who have similar interests to you. I’ve met some of my best friends through random school clubs or school sports teams that I joined just for fun! 

Sofia: But also, if you’re still on the shyer side, you can also take baby steps and reach out on social media. I’ve made friends through just like, replying to people’s Instagram stories and starting conversations through there. I think it’s also important to not psych yourself out, and remember that no one bites! It’s okay to be nervous, but like, at the end of the day, everyone is like you, a normal high schooler, so there’s nothing to be scared of! Smiling also goes a long way!

Advice on how to balance life out of school and homework/studying?

Sofia: I think the easiest way to have a good balance between life in and outside of school is to just get your work done ASAP. The sooner you get things done, the more time you have to yourself and whatever else you wanna dedicate your time to. There’s nothing you’re gonna regret more than procrastinating, I promise. I also think that allocating certain times to doing your work and creating a sort of work schedule really helps with that kinda stuff, so then you can like, work around that and see when you’re free and stuff. I’d also say take advantage of your free time in class and try to do your work then, too. Definitely not as fun as like, not doing work I will admit, but you’ll definitely be thankful when you have to do less work when you get home.

Alayna: 100000000% agree with Sofia. Procrastination is your worst enemy. I always just have to force myself to get my homework done first thing when I get home, and as hard as it is to motivate myself to do that, I always enjoy relaxing in the evening knowing all my work is done. Another thing that’s helped me balance school and life is to have a designated work area. This helps keep school separate from the rest of your life and also increases productivity. 

Advice on maintaining motivation for good grades?

Sofia: Try to have an end goal- I always motivate myself into getting good grades by telling myself like “Oh I really wanna have a 4.0 all year.” It gives me a goal to work towards, instead of just being like, “Oh I need good grades,” and makes me more motivated to do so, because I have a certain thing I wanna reach. Also, I try to make doing my work a little more fun. I do what the girls call “romanticize your life.” I like, use cute little pens to fill in my planner, read my assigned books with the intention of looking well-read (My Rory Gilmore era. I’ve never seen Gilmore Girls. Sorry, Reese.), and just like, achieving the good student image. 

How to kiss a girl?

Lauren: Dawg, it just happens in the moment. Boy, girl, gender doesn’t really affect how the kiss is going to play out. If this is your first kiss, it’s going to be awkward and weird, but you will get the hang of it.

How to deal with imposter syndrome?

Indira: Acknowledge your accomplishments. You did that and no one can take that away from you. Fake it until you make it, if no one else thinks you are not supposed to be somewhere then chances are it is your anxiety. And if someone does try to call you out, just be confident and mean. 

What to do if you’re single on Valentine’s Days?

Lauren: Take yourself out on a date. Even if you can’t spend time with a special someone on Valentines Day, doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy the holiday. Spoil yourself. Take yourself to the place you dreamed of going with a potential partner. Go get dinner. Go see that movie. You can even take your friends out on a date. Or, you can even treat this day as any other regular day. Only you can make this day the way you want it to be. Just make sure you enjoy yourself and don’t let being single get you down.